For context, I live with my fiance in a different country than my family. I haven’t seen them in over a year because, so my parents (61F and 63M) offered to visit me, and I was beyond happy. They have very humble beginnings in a third world country and this was their first time making an international trip, so I tried to make sure everything was perfect and as smooth as possible.
They came and spent about a month in our house. They had their own bed, their own bathroom, I arranged for all their necessities, and, even tho we’re not rich, my fiance and I tried to provide them with everything so they wouldn’t have to spend their money here, where the currency is 5x their own.
About our eating habits, my fiance and I have different schedules, different diets etc so we don’t eat together. Whenever one of us is hungry, we go to the kitchen and make ourselves a plate of food (we work from home). I explained this to my parents, and I also said, the kitchen is yours grab whatever you want and cook whenever you want.
As time went own, we noticed my parents weren’t eating much, so I asked them what they wanted from the grocery store so I could buy it for them. They said everything was fine, that they were indeed eating while I was working. My mom is naturally peckish so I thought that was just how she ate (I haven’t lived with my parents in over 10 years so I wouldn’t know for sure). In any case, my fiance brought my dad to the grocery store with him and told my dad “grab whatever you want”. And he only grabbed a few items. Anyway, this went on for pretty much the whole month. And everytime I asked they said it was all fine. At some point, I started taking them out for dinner every day after work, which quite literally broke the bank but at least I could see them eating. They left a few days ago, saying they loved their stay and that they had a blast.
So to my surprise, my sister (40F) called me today ripping me a new asshole, saying that my parents told her that they had no food to eat. That there was food in the fridge that they couldn’t eat because it belonged to us and that they had to keep making trips to the convenience store to buy food for themselves and that they spent a lot of money. I couldn’t believe my ears.
I’m feeling totally blindsided by this. I thought they knew how to cook their own food and if there was something missing, that they would’ve told me to buy. I took their word for it when they said everything was fine and that they were eating. My sister says I should’ve been more attentive to their needs and that I acted like I didn’t give a fuck. So now I’m feeling bad, thinking my parents were miserable and starving the whole time, while I thought they were fine. I don’t want to bring this up to my fiance, he will be devasted. He was genuinely trying the best he could to make my parents happy. Am I the asshole? What more could I have done?
